sitting around... thats what i do...
that and get fuckin irate about shit people do.... who made the list?
how about M-Tards "guests" that complain about things that are obviously not worth complaining over.... hm? "Why dont the pink buckets have pink lids... why are all the lids white... where are the pink lids at?" "Don't you have a toilet paper holder thats 1/4" bigger this way, but not the other way?" "Its just a standard faucet, not that it matters, just give me the parts I need fix it"
how about M-Tards for making me sell pink buckets and lids to the gruff con-tractor/farting/ nascar watching market... or for catering to their herpes and shit stained asses, by giving them Farting Santa Claus action figures, or more god damned nascar stickers or birthday knife sets
how about the mexican families that show up to buy custom tinted paint, 2 minutes before you close on a sunday night, then let their children barf all over the floor... for that matter, how abotu letting large mexican families in the store in the first place, since im getting tired of the kids stealing things or trashing the store
how about the asshole that invented the fucking Uni-Towel... yay. need to dry your hands? paper towels are expensive! those air powered hand dryers arent any good... we need something else... we need... a revolving uni towel! yes! lets put one 2 foot long towel in a loop and make people continually use a wet, fecal soaked towel to dry their hands...
how about the shit heads that continue to use a toilet as a turd dump, even though the city has shut the water off for some time... this; ofcourse, results in a legitimate use of a Turd Spoon;... yet another thing, I really dont need to have at the store to sell...
and on to things that dont suck..
the new Dimmu Borgir cd. definitively, not sucktackular. their best ever? hardly. but not sucktackular. devils. boobs. metal. weird accents from sweeden. 8 inch spiked leather shin guards. none of that sucks. Right now... I'm really digging track 9: The Invaluable Darkness. there is something about this bouncing riff, with the circus type keyboards... its just played so tight... so Old Man's Child tight... obviously Galder [guitarist for both bands] is doing alot more with Dimmu's writing.. {devil horns!}
watching the Yankees choke on it like a jr. high volleyball-playing slut at the hands of the Red Sox this weekend; also did not suck... I mean 'Yanks: show up to play... put 'Mo Rivera out there... Joe Torre says, "eh this shits in the bag"... 3 hits later... "When I said the shits in the bag, by bag I meant my pants, and by shit, I meant I just splattered them with my own shit" and then, they got busted in the mouth the monday night by the Devil Rays... the freaking Devil Rays...
heading out for a weekend of fun in chicago... does not suck. not possible. I'm sure it will be a good time, lots of story telling, drunkenness and such... ah, can't wait for the Not-Sucking, Time that will be had...
....
and on to other things...
to bring some funny:
QcOnline.com
Officials ask Iowans to burn wood not treated for beetle
DES MOINES, Iowa (AP) -- Iowans who bought a certain brand of firewood are asked to burn it as soon as possible because it wasn't properly treated to keep out a destructive insect called the emerald ash borer.
The Taylors Wood Products Inc. firewood was sold through the hardware chain Menards, according to the Iowa Department of Agriculture.
'Emerald ash borer is a destructive beetle that has the potential to devastate Iowa's ash trees,' Iowa Agriculture Secretary Bill Northey said in a statement. By burning firewood from the Springfield, Ill.-based company, he said 'Iowans can help slow the spread of this killer beetle.'
The firewood bundles found in Iowa contained wood pieces that had not been debarked, meaning they were not compliant with a federal quarantine, according the Iowa State University Extension's Web site.
While the beetle has not been detected yet in Iowa, Northey said is poses 'the most serious threat to Iowa's forest and urban ash tree population since Dutch elm disease more than 30 years ago.'
The U.S. Department of Agriculture issued an emergency action notice to Menards a week ago to remove the firewood from its sales areas, and has issued a national recall on all Taylors wood, Northey said.
The beetle was first identified in 2002 in Michigan, and is blamed for the more than 25 million dead or dying ash trees there. A handful of other states, including Illinois, and parts of Canada are also battling the emerald ash borer. ///end
Nevermind; I've been laughing about this for a while. The Taylor's brand comes on a skid, about 110 packs, individually wrapped, with a bright yellow card, reading: "Mold and Bug Free!". About every third package I unload is either teeming with some sort of roach-iguana hybrids; or is completely blue and green with mildew and mold growth. Quality. It stinks like hog lot run off, and quite honestly, is priced pretty expensively. Customers like to tell me, that they would rather steal wood from people in town, than buy this stuff. So, after a while of me laughing; dumb asses buying it... this gem of a story breaks. Good riddance!
Anyhow... I'm way over due on putting up a post about vomit. So. In the spirit of me taking a weekend away, feel free to send in any other great stories involving the V-juice. I know I've got a few... If someone has one thats really good, I'll run it too.
And Sayōnara means the Yankees suck!
//// out \\\\
