well peeps... im here. ive been getting a lot of run lately about how i havent been posting anything. so... its time for me to bring the ruckus once some more. yeah. in no particular order...
memo to "Dee" dear dee, loved the interview on channel 8 news tonight [www.wqad.com] , your thoughts about the recently discovered remains of a dead friend really rang true to me... youre right, its terrible... she probably was in car, with a strange man, "turning a trick", to support her crack cocaine habbit just like you said... and her boyfriend and family will miss her. got it.! " .. signed Me.
for everyone else. a burned corpse was found in a desolate area of town this week. the humorous part of it all, if death can be funny, was this person named "Dee" which the local newsboobs interviewed. appearantly, "Dee", or whatever the hell your name actually is, told us the woman was a friend of hers, and had [assumedly] like herself, given into crack cocaine. she told us about how they went to rehab together. she told us how she was out prostituting for crack. then "Dee" drop the jaw breaker... even she was scared to go out turning tricks now. something along the lines of... i shit you not... "its so hard now and so scary to go out in these strange cars, and know you might never come home to see your boyfriend or your children... but the drugs just make you do it, and you find yourself turning tricks because of the drugs" yeah. about 37 things wrong with that logic. first off. just quit taking drugs. second. stay in rehab. third. why not get a job, it pays you money and it doesnt leave you much time to do crack. fourth. if you didnt live in the project downtown, your crack dollars would probably be at work paying rent in a real place, again, leaving you no money for crack. fifth. prostitution isnt a job. sixth. if you are friends going into rehab, being in rehab, and coming out of rehab, odds are they smoked crack too. seven! keeping friends that smoke crack, probably wont keep you from smoking crack... something you dont have time for [see the third thing]. eight. even if you werent a crack-stitute, getting in cars with strange people probably isnt a great idea anyhow. nine. the type of people that would pick up a crack-stitute geeeeeeenerally arent nice people themselves. ten. successful prostitutes cant afford to get pregnant. multiple times. its considered a career ending injury... or career begining.... hmm... eleven. did your mom pop coke? then why should your kids have a mom that does that? twelve. why would a boyfriend approve of you being a crack-stitute again? maybe its because of... thirteen. your boyfriend seems to be ok with whoring for crack part, but isnt there something wrong with that sentence? fourteen. if your only worried about the prostitution side of this lifestyle, maybe you should re-examine the crack smoking portion of this mess... fifteen. at what point was it ever safe to smoke crack, whore yourself, and go around with strange people, if its suddenly dangerous to do it now? sixteen. you lived in project housing... but with kids, crack addiction, whoring and a boyfriend, shouldnt that bump your tax bracket up to "low-scale trailer park?" seventeen. if you cite prostitution as your taxable income, do you figure crack addiction to be a business write-off? ... all right... so there we go... i could keep on this... but the point is.... smoking crack. with kids. screwing random dirty men, to buy more crack, while your boyfriend knows this sitting around at home, seems to be an all round bad situtaion. but its just rediculous. much like the Shricker Apartments.... this is the place that receives approximately 300 police calls per year... is nestled on the one block stretch between the davenport police department, and the scott county sherriffs office/jail and courthouse. sadly enough, there is a fire department stationed on an adjoining property. for those of you that cant fathom this... its just kind of how it is here.
id also like to run a shout out to my man... Radon Guy. Radon is poisoness, radioactive gas, released by decaying soil contaminants. radon has no odor, no color, and is the second leading cause of lung cancer. you, Mr. Radon Guy, take all shapes, colors and genders, but remain stupid. you run out to the store, buy the kit... sometimes calling it a radar kit. and then seem to think its too expensive to buy the kit to test if you have it, then seeing how the kit is 10 dollars plus lab fees, wont buy it. well, Radon Guy, today you surprised me. you showed up for this memorable scene at work...
Radon Guy - "hey buddy"
Me- is there something i can do for you
RG- yeah i got this radar tester, and it says i got radar in my basement
Me- huh.
RG - i need one of those fans.
Me- excuse me?
RG - yeah, i need that fan you put in to blow it out
Me- anti aircraft guns?
RG- no its a fan, and i have to get it
Me- radon gas... its not radar..
RG- you dont know what your talking about buddy, just listen to me, i need this fan right now, where the hell do you keep them
Me- .... we dont stock fans for that
RG- well why the hell not, i need one [starts pulling at his hair]
Me- well, venting out radon involves more than a fan... generally, licenesed professionals have to bore holes into the footings below the house, and run vent work, coupled with a fan... in addition to sealing crack and the cold joint the house rests on-
RG- so you mean to tell me you dont even have what i need
Me- putting a fan in the basement isnt going to do anything
RG- god dammit, why cant you just keep the stuff people need [starts getting very agitated, now yells] fuck it. im going to lowes.
Me- they wont have it either. the fan would just blow it around some i suppose. maybe agitate it.
RG- it WILL TOO! [Radon Guy stomps out]
My Boss- god what a moron
Me- yeah, well i suppose ill fill out the I MISSED A SALE form for that, since we dont stock radon fans... "Dear Corporate, I missed a sale on radon fans[?] because the we did not stock such items, for an immediate guest purchase"
My Boss- now why the hell would do a thing like that
Me- i dunno, radon guy is right, we dont have them do we
Dear Radon Guy. thanks for the memories. i hope you die in your sleep. lung cancer is a bitch. signed [me]
